It’s Not High Art

It's not high art or any art for that matter. 

This is just a picture I took after a vape break. I was walking back inside and I saw this construction worker just sitting there taking a break. I liked the lines leading to him, and the washed-out sun in the background, so I snapped the photo. I didn’t stop, just kept on walking. I only took one shot. 

Now, what am I not telling you? I’m not telling you that I wanted to take another shot of him. That I wanted to stand there for a while snapping away, getting the framing right, the composition right, playing with my settings and the exposure until he felt someone watching him. I wanted to keep snapping away until he turned around and caught me. I wanted him to ask, “what the hell was I doing?” I wanted to go up to him and show him the couple of shots I took of him. I wanted him to say, “not bad. Can I have one?” 

“Sure,” I’d say and direct him to this blog, website, online journal, or whatever the hell this space is. I still don’t know. 

That didn’t happen because, well, I was afraid. Part of me is still afraid to take people’s pictures. That’s just a little bit of the struggle I’m going through now. I’m afraid. Afraid of a lot of things. 

I can’t pinpoint when this fear crept in. I wasn’t always like this, I used to be a tad fearless when it came to making art. Then, the fear crept in, and well, here I am. 

I’ve got my suspicions of when it happened, but I’m not too damn sure. All I know is that it did happen, and I have to live with it every day. 

That’s what sucks about fear, but I know this; I want to change it. 

Thing is, I didn't mean for it to be black and white. That was an accident. The other day, while playing with my iPhone, I found a setting that made everything black and white. I’ve had this phone for over a year, and some change, and I didn’t know it did that. So, that was an accident. Somehow the shot “worked" in my mind. Plus, it’s only one of the few pictures I took today.  

One of my many aspirations is to be a "street photographer." I like the idea of it. I’ve got others, but right now, this one is a biggie. I want to train my eye not only for photography but for filmmaking as well. 

I want to learn to tell stories visually.

I follow a guy by the name of Eric Kim quite a bit. Love his website. Love his photography as well. He's been somewhat of inspiration of late. 

One thing he talks about is photographing your life. I like how he photographs his life. The story he tells of his life through his photography. If I could pick one guy to steal from right now, he would be the guy. 

The one thing that occurred to me the other day is if I love photography or not - or video or film - for that matter. It’s a question I'm wrestling with right now. Like I wrestle with putting myself out there. It’s a problem that, again, I’m looking to solve. 

Hence, this blog, online journal, website, or whatever the hell it is. It is what I decide to make it. I’ll make it something, but I do know this, I’m tired of having nothing. 

So there it is. 

For now, I’m going to keep it simple. I’m going to shoot a picture a day and post it. I’m also going to write seven hundred and fifty words a day and post it. A sort of brain dump about my day. 

That’s my goal. I’ll try to make it interesting. If nothing else entertaining. We’ll see what happens. 

I live a boring life - well, it’s exciting to me - but to other folks, it may be boring. I’ll tell a story here every now and then. Maybe comment about the happenings of the day. The thing is, I want to concentrate on photography and filmmaking right now. 

Here’s the way I figure it, seven hundred and fifty words take someone about someone seven minutes to read. That’s not too bad. Unless your staying after class and Mrs. Delgado is your first-grade teacher. Five minutes was way too long. That lady was crazy. So seven minutes is a pretty good place to start. 

Again, we’ll see where this goes.